Boys can be so MEAN. (FYI: I just realized that “mean” is really “men” with an extra vowel hahaha)
Also mean? Massive work deadlines that I’m under, so I CAN’T write a long Toolbag Tuesday story today with a moral and everything.
I know…I’m so mean.
But what I CAN do is post notes from Toolbag Tuesday submissions I’ve received that have NO moral.
The ones with a certain WTF quality about them…you know, where I don’t want any more information.
So without further ado, I give you: MEAN BOYS COMPILATION, TAKE 1:
1.) He dutch-ovened me on a one-night stand and then stole my shoes. (Ed note: hahahahaha I actually should get more information about this.)
2.) Immediately said “don’t tell Britney about this” after we hooked up (Britney is my best friend.)
3.) I planned a very sexy celebration weekend for his birthday and found out at dinner that he had actually gone out for his birthday (on the actual day) but I was not invited.
4.) Flew back to visit my long-distance boyfriend for the holidays after almost six months away and asked him, “So what are we doing for New Years?” And he said, “As of now, I’m going hunting.”
5.) He had a ticket to go to France and then broke the news the day before he left that he was actually going to visit his ex-girlfriend there. He promised they were just friends and he’d email me all the time. I got one email from him, of a photo of a busted statue from a museum with no subject, note or description. He never called me again even after he returned.
6.) Picked a fight with me because he said I “cut green onions wrong” when I was making us nachos and it made him question our entire relationship.
7.) Found out he was picking up men AND women on Craig’s List, only because I got a notification that he changed our Craig’s List password. He was using the same account we had used to sell our sofa.
8.) Hooked up with a guy and the next day had a mutual friend/co-worker of his find out if he liked me, and he told her that he was actually secretly in love with her and asked her out to dinner that night.
…I mean, can there possibly be a moral to any of these???
Don’t steal your one-night stand’s shoes.
Don’t pick up people on Craig’s List.
..And make your own damn nachos.
Got a Toolbag Tuesday story?
Riiiiiight, that was the year I realized the difference between a good boyfriend and a bad boyfriend.
His name was Edward and he was a financial adviser, which translates to super big hotshot in New York.
He didn’t care about anything but himself.
And no amount of explaining my feelings would make him be a supportive person, or make him stop doing whatever the Fhe wanted to do.
It’s no secret that guys don’t know a good picture of themselves.
Facebook isn’t real life.
Of course Mark chose this picture to include in the roundup.
HE TAKES PICTURES FOR NATIONAL PUBLICATIONS FOR CHRIST SAKE!
Did he NOT notice that half my face is asleep, like a stoke patient?
That he made me look cross-eyed and have FOUR CHINS???
How is it possible to bust a complete stranger who just got your number???
I really should thank Max for being such a toolbag, since his job was the one that I took over as editor for once upon a time.