File this in the great dating debate: How do you let someone know that you don’t want to see them again after one or two dates?

Do you not call or text them ever again, letting your silence get the message across? 

Or do you call them to break the news that it’s not you…it’s them?

Bradley, this guy I went on exactly one date with, went with option three: Sending a text saying he was going to be BUSY FOR THE FORESEEABLE FUTURE as a way to get his point across. 

…But then three days later picture messaged me a photo of how UN-busy he was. 

Upload that shit to Facebook, dude.

This blow-off was particularly annoying since at the end of our one and only date, Bradley was so into me that he begged me to sleep over at his place. 
Really. Begged.

I said no for a number of reasons, including the fact that we met online (ugh), he wasn’t my type or even that cute, and he made me pay for a round of drinks. (Lots of toolbag qualities here.)

But I actually waived these red flags and told myself to give him another chance. 

We had mutual friends, after all. 
We laughed a lot on our date. 
Also, he had a pool. 

Yet, four days had passed since I left him begging, and hadn’t heard from him. 
That’s odd, I thought. I had expected to hear from him immediately. 

After all, I’m so GOD DAMN IRRESISTIBLE that he begged me to sleep over, right? Shouldn’t he be setting up another date ASAP?

Instead, I ended up texting him, four days later, while frowning.

“Good weekend?” I wrote casually. 

He didn’t write back for a full 24 hours.  

“Hectic weekend.”

24 hours to write back two words? 
What happened to the begging??

But, I still had hope. 
And he had a pool.

“Yea, I’m busy too. April is crazy,” I wrote.

Another 24 hours passed until he responded. Curtly.

“Maybe we can grab another drink sometime but it will honestly be a while before I’m free.”

He wrote the word “honestly.” 

Now, that text is annoying enough with its obvious, “yea…I won’t be making time to see you again,” tone.

I cut my losses and thanked God I didn’t sleep over. 

Yet, three days later, THREE DAYS LATER, I get a picture text message from him. 


“Chillin by the pool!!” he wrote, with two exclamation points, underneath the sunny photo of pool toys floating by the steps.


So he’s NOT TOO BUSY to chill by the POOL, huh?? 


I noted that his text didn’t include an invite to his pool. 

He just – what?- wanted to let me know how he was spending his Saturday afternoon? 


Did he forget what he wrote me three days earlier? 

What was I supposed to write back? 
“Oh, you’re by the pool??? Honestly??”

I mean, come on. Don’t tell someone you’re “busy” and then three days later go out of your way to actually show them how not busy you are. 



One thought on “TOOLBAG TUESDAY

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s